So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
only you would photoshop your dick
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
There is a 97.5% chance that my sketchy roommate is also a hooker.
So when can I meet her?
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
Randomize
