Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
How do you jack off and text at the same time?
On my iPhone they have an app for that
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
My wedding band has saved me from at least four cases of herpes tonight.
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
Randomize
