She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
Randomize
