You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
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