OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
Error 1684C: You're last text was undeeliverable. Subscriber is our to the aera.
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
How many fucks given?
0.12846
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
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