We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
I woke up this morning covered in blood and peanut butter. I am now safe from vampires with nut allergies.
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
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