Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
I have been standing totally still for the past 6 minutes because I was convinced my foot was tied to the ground. It turns out it was a string of hair strewn across my foot
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Randomize
