My hand turned me down
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
Randomize