508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
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