Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
apparently the secret to your success is patron
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
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