HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
Randomize
