I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
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