did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
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