He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
Hows this for an invention: a toilet that weighs your poop
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
SO HELP ME GOD THERE IS A SPIDER IN THIS PIZZA. IT IS VERY SMALL IT IS INSIDE THE CRUST AND IT IS ALIVE. I'M SO HUNGRY DO I KEEP EATING
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
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