Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Randomize
