I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
no dude he sent me cemetery flowers, i know it. they are half dried out roses in the shape of a cross, seriously. and he is not religious. so he robbed a freaking grave site for me. am i like an accessory to grave robbing now??
damnit this is what you get for dating guys with neck tattoos
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