Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Randomize
