Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
Randomize
