his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
He just brought me a wine glass. Full of Tequila. Ignore any texts after this one.
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
What am I supposed to say? "Hi new uncle in law once I tried cocaine in Mexico and every once in a while i motorboat strangers. so happy to be a part of your family"
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
Randomize
