she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
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