Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
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