SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
i really wanted you to get laid last night and i didnt think you were going to. so i posted porn on your facebook.it made sense at 3am
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
My dad found me naked curled up under a towel on the couch with a fucking tub of butter and a spoon. Ambien Mondays are dead
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
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