i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
i just had to use the keg as a stool to reach the margarita maker. i'm such a problem solver.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
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