# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
Randomize
