Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
i think my cat just said my name.
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
Randomize