Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize
