Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
Randomize
