How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
Get my husband this drunk again I will rip off your balls off with my bare hands and then cut them up with a dirty axe like fish bits. Do you understand me? DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME?! See you at breakfast, FUCK FACE. I'll shove that bottle of Jamison so far up your ass you'll still be praying in 2020 you can take a shit! Seriously, you make it hard to be your best friend.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
Randomize
