just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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