I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
I DO have hobbies! I drink. I drink more. I catfish men on Grindr with photos of guys who are less attractive than me. I listen to Lovecraftian podcasts. I'm very well-rounded.
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
Randomize
