he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
I really wish I could go back in time to change the course of events that led to me sitting on the internet at 3 Googling 'Traumatic masturbation' while talking to you about failed dates, and running a virtual restaurant in a video game.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
Randomize
