I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
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