I only kidnapped one of them. chill
my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
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