We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
Randomize
