good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
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