The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
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