i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
Blow job season was short but glorious.
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
Look I'm really hungover so let's try this again. In 5 mins you're gonna call me and tell me that you're on your way with xannies, iced coffee and a back rub
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Randomize