fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
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