you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize
