it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
Randomize
