Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
Just woke up next to a hungry lesbian and a half eaten croissant on my stomach. Can you come get me?
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