sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
I woke up to a head of lettuce on my nightstand, someones Honda abandoned in my yard, the cat partially shaved, and a empty bottle of sailor hanging by a scarf from the rafters. Oh, and 26 people apparently came though and rubbed my back in the process of the night. Happy 23rd to me!
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
