i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
We were destined to go to rehab together
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
Randomize
