break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
my poor anus
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
Randomize
