I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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