What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
Randomize
