who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
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