And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
Lucky for you, I found your phone.....Not so lucky for you, it was in the bottom of your vomit-filled trashcan.
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
Randomize
