I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
Randomize
