Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
I know you're aving fun across the room but I can clearly see you getting a handy. It's not as "low key" as she promised. Also, why are you texting while she's doing it?!
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
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