So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
I told her I'd give her some of the cream I was using so she didn't get my warts. That's when I realized I was too drunk.
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
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